Reading Body Language

Reading body language is an important skill if you want to attract the girl of your dreams.

It is important to use your body to convey messages to women. Your body makes a statement as loud, or louder than your words.

But equally important is tuning in to or reading body language. It is just as important to understand what women are telling you with their body language as it is to convey your own message.

Pay attention to how people react to you when you interact with them. If you are at work, and you’re involved in a stressful situation, what happens? Do people’s arms fall loosely at their sides? Do they sit in a chair with their feet comfortably resting on the floor? Or do people cross their arms across their chest and hunch their shoulders? Do they cross their legs and their arms, completely closing themselves off? Or do they cross their arms across their chest and throw their shoulders back in a defensive yet haughty kind of way?

There was a funny Seinfeld episode about close-talkers. A close-talker is someone who violates your personal space when they talk to you. They get uncomfortably close in all situations, not just situations where getting close is called for (like when you’re whispering). If you’ve seen the Seinfeld episode, you’ll remember the struggle to get away from the close-talker.

If you don't know what I'm talking about than you can watch below.....enjoy!

You see, people react in a similar fashion even if their personal space is not being violated. In non-verbal, non-action ways, people withdrawal from conversations when they are uncomfortable and reading body language can give you a heads up before that happens!

Going back to the stressful work situation. People withdrawal by crossing their arms in front of their chest, or crossing their legs if they are sitting down. People almost completely withdrawal when they do a combination of crossing their arms and their legs, and lowering their gaze so they don’t look at anyone directly. Rolling shoulders forward is a further indication of closing oneself off.

Alternatively, people communicate their comfort through their body language. Obviously, if a woman doesn’t have her arms crossed over her chest, she is in somewhat of an open stance. However, there is a big difference between a woman standing 2 feet away without her arms crossed, and one standing 8 feet away without her arms crossed. The woman standing closer is more comfortable than the one standing further away.

In an earlier article, I reviewed what women want. One of the things I talked about is making a woman laugh. Even if you’re not at the point where you are interacting with women you want to pick up, notice what happens when you talk to people who are laughing. It is relatively hard to maintain a closed body language (arms crossed, gaze down, shoulders hunched), when you’re laughing.

If you don’t have the opportunity to notice other people’s body language when they’re laughing, then notice your own. When you’re involved in a conversation where you’re comfortable with the person, and you’re laughing, what happens to your own body?

It is vitally important to become aware of what people convey through their body language. If you don’t lead the kind of life where you have the opportunity to observe people, then you need to put yourself somewhere where you can observe people.

When you have some free time, go to a place where there are a lot of people. Malls are great places to people watch. Parks where there are a lot of people are also good places, except that people tend to be more relaxed at a park. Food courts (like those found in a mall) are great places to observe lots of different people. Fast food restaurants, or deli-style restaurants where you can sit and eat are also good places to observe.

When you observe people, get a read on how you think they’re feeling. For instance, in a food court, you might see someone dressed in a uniform, or with an id badge, grabbing a quick bite to eat before going back to work. If they’re in a hurry, you will see that in their body language. Someone who is receiving lousy service while trying to get their food will convey their feeling of frustration through their body language. Notice how people hold their body depending on the situation.

Someone who is tired will move slowly. Someone who has a lot of energy will move quickly. A mother with several kids in tow will behave differently than a mother with an adult child.

Reading body language and knowing the signs people give you that they are comfortable or uncomfortable will go a long way toward your goal of attracting women. Studying people and reading body language will give you the knowledge you need to gauge your impact on other people.

Related Articles:

Eye Body Language
Body Language Signs
The Art of Body Language
Body Language Mistakes

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